HESL Day 1: Understanding

Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.
Carl Jung


Firstly, I learned that I inherited my father's persona, a laid-back and easy-going person. 
Yes! I do get bored easily = impatience. 
Deep inside, my mind is racing with thoughts, going crazy, yet I appear steady from the outside. Why? Because I never wanted people to know, even those close to me, what is really happening to me. Hence, I need to let go and let God do the work. Trust, faith, that everything will be all right when we leave it to God through prayer.


Secondly, my self-esteem. I need to learn to love myself- for who I am, not based on what I can give. I am a child of God and He loves me just as I am.


Thirdly, speak-up and release. To think positive. To trust God in good and bad times, the latter gave me that 'kick' in the butt. Prior to HESL, I felt that the world betrayed and abandoned me. My dreams were shattered- after my contract ended, I couldn't find work (I started looking upon my 3rd month), thus, I returned home, leaving my partner behind in Singapore. Unfortunately, my prayers and novenas didn't help. Heck! How were they supposed to, when my prayers to the gods and saints were as confused as I was! Moreover, I didn't get out of bed that much, except to the toilet and around the house, always staring at my laptop. Just didn't have the energy to face the world. Shocked much huh?


When we ask for patience, God gives us patience through trials, where we can practice and develop. For it is through trials and pain that we gain lessons and character strength, we work for it, we forget that it is a Process. Always ask for guidance, wisdom and enlightenment.


Fourthly, learn to open up to touch. Trust she will be here for you, and reciprocate with a hug and/or kiss. When she  holds my arm, by instinct or reflex, I remove her hand because I grew up with touch from my mother as a punishment. Hence, I must unlearn the latter and accept touch as love and support.


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